A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.
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If you think your life is bad, how would you like to be an egg?
You get laid once in life, you only get eatten once in life, It takes 4 min to get hard, but only 2 min. to get soft, you share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all the only chick who ever sat on your face was your mother.
Pass this to someone who needs a good lay, sorry I mean day.
What do you call a sex-crazed gay cannibal?
A head hunter!
A girl married with a man who had only one foot.
Next day her mother rang her and asked: "My little tell me how did U feel the marriage?"
Her daughter replied: "Woo real splendid; alas he has only one foot!"
Her mom answered: "You must be too lucky, when I married your dad; he had only one inch!"
Dont you hate it when you open a bag of chips and its half full?!
Yeah, that's how us guys feel about push-up bras!
Their was a camel and elephant, the elephant said to the camel.
"How come you have your t*ts on your back?" and the camel got offended so he told the elephant.
"Well why do you have your d*ck on your face?"
What is the same with spreading butter on a toast and getting a woman to spread her legs?
It is possible with a credit card, but much easier with a knife.
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
Q: What do tofu and a dildo have in common?
A: They are both meat substitutes.
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Q: What did the prositutes knee say to the other?
A: Nothing. They have never met.
Q: How do you keep black youth off the streets?
A: Put a KFC on the sidewalk
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