Joke #6920

I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I kinda liked it.
Vote:
has 80.45 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: life

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

The Dove Bar's like an 80-pound wad of chocolate on a toothpick. If you're not careful when you take it out of the package, you'll snap your wrists.
Vote:
has 21.41 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: chocolate, life
A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly, she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back. "Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. "Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says. They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards the theater followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap ......... and stay for breakfast. The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed!! Everything had been SO incredible!!!! "You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?". "No," she replies, "You just happened to catch my eye."
Vote:
has 68.51 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: ginger, life, money, women
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Yell at her.
Vote:
has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: life, work
Why It Sucks to Be an Egg... You only get laid once, you only get hard once, and when you DO finally get hard, it takes under three minutes and you're already in hot water.
Vote:
has 78.45 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: food, life
Q:Did you hear the joke about the rope? A:Just skip it.
Vote:
has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: life
A shopkeeper was dismayed when a store opened next door with a huge sign that said, BEST DEALS!” To make things worse, another store opened on the other side with a huge sign reading “LOWEST PRICES!” He nearly panicked until he had the idea to put up his own sign, bigger that the other two, that read, “MAIN ENTRANCE.”
Vote:
has 83.99 % from 225 votes. More jokes about: life
The houseman invited over his boss and partners, for lunch. With them, his little 5year-old daughter was there. "Don’t you want to say the prayers before lunch, so Our Holly Father give us his blessings?," asks the father. "But... I don’t know what to say...," the little girl admits. "Just say what you heard your mommy say last time inside the kitchen!," said her mother to help her. And the girl: "Oh, God! Why in this life, my husband must invite all these people for lunch?"
Vote:
has 63.51 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: food, god, husband, kids, life
Hilary Clinton, George Bush, Sarkozy, a boy and a monk were stuck on a plane that is falling fast. They are 5 but there are only 4 parachutes. Hilary said "I'm a woman, you cant leave a woman on a plane to die" so she took one and jumped. Bush said "I'm the smartest in the world, every one needs me" he took one and jumped. Sarkozy blabbed something in french that no one understood, he took one and jumped. The monk tells the boy "You take the last parachute, let me die" the boy said "Why? We can both jump." "How is that?" said the monk. The boy replies, "Because the so called smartest man Bush took my school bag and jumped!"
Vote:
has 61.92 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: airplane, life, political, school
Taylor swift: so he calls me up and he's all like "I still love you" and I'm like... Wait, is this Connor, Patrick, Joe, Luca, Taylor, John, Cory, Toby, Jake, Garret, Eddie, or Harry?
Vote:
has 60.75 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life, love, music
Life is an open door. It can be closed at any time, so don’t complain about the draught.
Vote:
has 43.90 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: life