Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
When Miley Cyrus is naked and licks a hammer it's "art" and "music"... but when I do it, I'm "wasted" and "have to leave Home Depot".
Taylor Swift waved at a boy yesterday and he didn't wave back... So she will have a new album coming out tomorrow.
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
I watched Justin Bieber get shot in CSI and my brother asked "Why are you crying?" I said "Because he didn't die in real life"
When Chuck Norris crosses the pacific, swimming, sharks hear the "Jaws" music.
Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.
The Mona Lisa is smiling because Chuck Norris let her live.
If you rate this kickass, then Chuck Norris WILL roundhouse kick Justin Bieber's ass.
James Bond was trained by Chuck Norris, as his butler.