Q: What's brown and taps on the window? A: A baby in a microwave!
On a cold day of January, I went to visit one of my friends in his house; it was snowing and my friend urged me to stay the night with him. They had only 2 rooms one for themselves and other for their baby; so I suggested to rest in baby' room. In middle of the night, I need WC which was in the garden and was so difficult for me to go there. I thought some moments then decided to change my place with the baby. I did so. And pissed in the place of baby; when I returned to change again I saw that the baby had shitted in my bed!
What is funnier than a zombie baby hanging from a ceiling fan? Hitting it with a shovel when it comes around.
I got home to see my two months pregnant wife crouched in the bathroom crying. Her red, smudged eyes looked at me as she told me she'd lost the baby. I told the silly thing not to be so upset, I could clearly see it in the toilet.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.
What's green and sits in the corner? That same baby three weeks later.
Q: How do you get a zombie baby into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Doritos.
What's red and sits in a corner? A baby playing with a razor blade.
Q: What's worse then finding 10 zombie babies in a garbage can? A: Finding one zombie baby in 10 garbage cans.
Why did the zombie baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.
What's red and lies in all four corners of the room? A baby that's been playing with a chainsaw.