A guy goes to the store to buy condoms.
"Do you want a bag?", the cashier asks.
"No", the guy says, "She's not that ugly."
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Q: Why do women wear makeup and perfume?
A: Because they're ugly and they stink.
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
Insurance companies are trying to set new guidelines before approving Viagra coverage.
What will they use to set those guidelines?
A growth chart.
Yo mama so ugly when she went to sleep Freddy Krueger was scared of her.
Yo mamma so ugly that her birth certificate came with an apology letter from the condom factory.
Yo mama is so ugly that she could be the poster child for birth control.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, I asked if her face hurt because it was killing me.
Q: What's the difference between 3 d*cks and a joke?
A: Your mom can't take a joke.
When two men have sex what position are they going to be in?
But what about when two dogs have sex?
That means that the two men are having sex doggy style then what ways are the dogs having sex?
That means that the dogs are having an affair with the men to have sex doggy style.