Joke #739

A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. "Do you want a bag?", the cashier asks. "No", the guy says, "She's not that ugly."
Vote: has 63.51 % from 92 votes. Send joke:

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Yo mama is so ugly that when I showed a picture of my ass they said they are twins!
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A man says to his wife, "Get ready you, me & the dog are going fishing." Wife says, "I dont want to go." Man gives her 3 choices, fishing, blow job or take it up the a*se. Wife pick blow job. After she sucking for a while she says, "It tastes like sh*t. Man says, "I know, dog didnt want to go fishing either."
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A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's steering wheel stuck to the front of his pants. The bartender asks, "Hey, doesn't that hurt?" The pirate growls, "Aye, it's drivin' me nuts."
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Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says, "I hear that you’ve been telling people that I’m ugly!" "Oh NO! I’ve just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive." "I also heard that you’ve been calling me fat?" "Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear those stripes makes you look larger than you really are." "I’ve also heard that you’re saying that my husband has a wart on his dick!" "Oh NO! I only said that it feels like he has a wart on his dick!"
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How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator? Grease her hips, and throw in a Twinkie.
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Yo mama so ugly when she takes baths water hops out.
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Yo mamas so ugly when Bob the builder saw her he said "Oh cannot fix that."
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Yo' Mama is so ugly, her imaginary friend played with other kids.
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A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. "Do you want a bag?", the cashier asks. "No", the guy says, "She's not that ugly."
Vote: has 65.00 % from 405 votes. Send joke:

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Yo mama so ugly it caused Godzilla to go back to the ocean.
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