Joke #7193

I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears. What am I? Ugly!

Yo Mama so hairy, when she shaved her legs, your dad thought she got a new carpet.

Yo mama's lips are so big when you smile you wet your hair.

A guy goes into this bar, sits down and orders a drink. While waiting, he sees a guy sitting at the bar who has a very big muscular body but a little tiny head. So, he asks the guy, "How is it that you have such a huge body and a small head?" The guy replied, "I was walking along the beach one day and I came across this bottle buried halfway in the sand. So I picked it up, brushed away the sand, and out popped this fine female genie. She said she would grant me three wishes for releasing her." "For my first wish, I asked for ten-million dollars, and POOF right there on the sand was $10,000,00." "For my second wish, I asked for a luxury yacht, and POOF right there on the ocean was a 90-foot yacht." "Finally for my third wish, I asked to have sex with the genie, but she said that genies were not allowed to indulge in that kind of activities." So, I said, "c'mon, how about a little head?"

What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.

You would think that taking off a snail's shell would make it move faster, but it actually just makes it more sluggish.

Q: What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy? A: At least when you are eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you.

Why did God give women legs? So they don't leave a trail like a slug.

Yo momma so ugly that she made all her blind kids cry.

I'm not saying my wife is ugly... but on Halloween, she went to tell the neighbors to turn their TV down and they gave her some candy.

I am a dog And you are a flower. I lift my leg up And give you a shower.