Joke #7193

I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears. What am I? Ugly!
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Gay translation I want a commitment. I'm sick of masturbation. Haven't I seen you before? Nice ass. I need you. My hand is tired. You're the only man I've ever cared about. You are the only man who hasn't rejected me. I'm a Romantic. I'm poor. I really want to get to know you better. So I can tell my friends about it. It's just orange juice, try it. 3 more shots, and he'll have his legs around my head. He's kinda cute. I want to have sex with him till my dick turns blue! He's not my type. He won't sleep with me. I miss you so much I am so horny that my dog is starting to look good. I had a wonderful time last night. Who the hell are you? Do you love me? I've done something stupid and you might find out. Do you 'really' love me? I've done something stupid and you're going to find out. I'll give you a call. I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again. I've been thinking a lot. You're not as attractive as when I was drunk. I think we should just be friends. You're ugly. I've learned a lot from you. Next!!!!
Vote: has 55.74 % from 200 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, gay, love, masturbation, ugly
Three guys compare their levels of intoxication from a party the previous night. The first guy says, "Man, I was so drunk last night, I went home and blew chunks." The second guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I woke up this morning on my front porch." The third guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I took a prostitute home to my wife." The first guy exclaims, "You guys don't understand! Chunks is my dog!"
Vote: has 80.58 % from 231 votes. Send joke:

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, faces like yours belong in a zoo. Don't worry I'll be there too, not in the cage, but laughing at you.
Vote: has 75.00 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, insulting, poems, ugly
There was this guy who was sick,so he went to the doctor. The doc ran some tests and sent him home with some medicine. The next day the doctor called and the wife answered. "I'm going to need to run a few more tests", the doctor said. "I'm going to need a semen, urine and a fecal sample". After she hung up the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?" "He needs a pair of your underwear".
Vote: has 74.33 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What's the difference between pea soup and roast beef? A: Anyone can roast beef.
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More jokes about: disgusting, food
A woman is standing looking in the bedroom mirror… She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly… I really need you to pay me a compliment.” The husband replies, “Your eyesight’s damn near perfect.”
Vote: has 80.95 % from 300 votes. Send joke:

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What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on someone's forehead? Unsightly facial hare.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

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Yo momma’s so ugly, the Government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: birthday, Halloween, ugly, Yo mama
Yo mama is so ugly she reminds me SUN, is hard to look at her.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

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Q: How is a pussy like a grapefruit? A: The best ones squirt when you eat them.
Vote: has 71.37 % from 220 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting