Joke #8593

Chuck Norris never gets dirty. The dirt is too afraid to even touch him or his clothes.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
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Chuck Norris impregnates women without having sex with them.
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Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
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Chuck Norris made Dirty Harry's day.
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Chuck Norris went to school so he could be studied.
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During a war warrior shouted against 3 ladies Warrior: I am going to r*pe you all. Younger lady: But please leave our grand mother. Grand mother: Shut up, war is war.
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Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
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Friend: Dude, I can't stop dreaming about my crush. Me: Well imagine this... You're home alone, and your crush comes over to visit. Friend: Ok I can see it... Me: She walks into your room and you're just sitting there. Friend: Uh-huh.. I'm likin' this. Me: Ok. So she walks in front of you, takes her pants off. She's not wearing any underwear.. And then she sits on you. Friend: Oh-ho-hoo.. Whatta' naughty girl. Me: Yeah, ok. Don't get dirty on me. So she's sitting on you. And then... she starting shitting in you. Right then and there, you find out you're a toilet. Friend: I hate you...
Vote: has 69.67 % from 138 votes. Send joke:

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Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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