Joke #7656

Three men go on a skiing trip, but when they get to the HOTEL they find out that the hotel have mucked up their rooms and they have to share one big bed. When they wake up the guy on the left says I had a well strange dream last night that I was getting a hand job, and then the guy on the right goes thats strange O had the same dream I was getting a hand job. Then the guy in the middle goes well thats strange because I had a dream I was skiing!
Vote:
has 80.30 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, sport

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

When a woman gets a vibrator, it's seen as a bit of naughty fun. But when a guy orders a 240 volt Fuckmaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collecting tray, together with optional built-in realistic orgasm scream 7.1 sound system, he's called a pervert.
Vote:
has 83.84 % from 244 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, women
Q: When is the only time a guy can multi-task? A: When he's watching porn, masturbating, and keeping an eye on the door at the same time...
Vote:
has 82.71 % from 376 votes. More jokes about: dirty, masturbation, men, time
A man is at the optometrist getting his eyes checked. "You need to stop masturbating so much," the optometrist says. "Why?" asks the man. "Is it going to make me go blind?" The optometrist looks around and says "no, but it's making the other patients very uncomfortable."
Vote:
has 80.93 % from 253 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, masturbation, men
A foursome is waiting at the men's tee when another foursome of ladies are hitting from the ladies tee. The ladies are taking their time and when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10 feet, goes over to it, hacks it another ten feet and looks up at the men waiting and says apologetically "I guess all those fucking lessons I took this winter didn't help." One of the men immediately replies, "No, you see that's your problem. You should have been taking golf lessons instead."
Vote:
has 63.32 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: golf, men, sport, winter, women
Q: What do you get if you cross a dirty politician with a filthy womanizer? A: Chelsea.
Vote:
has 60.35 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, political, soccer, sport
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they? A: His left hand and his right hand.
Vote:
has 58.77 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, sex
Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the Olympics? He had it bronzed.
Vote:
has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: men, sport
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Vote:
has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: men, sport, technology, time
This stupid bug is appearing on a blasted line which would blow up the toilet. Then they go like "Tom tom tom tom" then back to the toilet and stupidly disgusted by a recently married woman and erecting a man in a toilet.
Vote:
has 13.74 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, masturbation, men, women
Gay translation I want a commitment. I'm sick of masturbation. Haven't I seen you before? Nice ass. I need you. My hand is tired. You're the only man I've ever cared about. You are the only man who hasn't rejected me. I'm a Romantic. I'm poor. I really want to get to know you better. So I can tell my friends about it. It's just orange juice, try it. 3 more shots, and he'll have his legs around my head. He's kinda cute. I want to have sex with him till my dick turns blue! He's not my type. He won't sleep with me. I miss you so much I am so horny that my dog is starting to look good. I had a wonderful time last night. Who the hell are you? Do you love me? I've done something stupid and you might find out. Do you 'really' love me? I've done something stupid and you're going to find out. I'll give you a call. I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again. I've been thinking a lot. You're not as attractive as when I was drunk. I think we should just be friends. You're ugly. I've learned a lot from you. Next!!!!
Vote:
has 54.84 % from 250 votes. More jokes about: animal, gay, love, masturbation, ugly