Joke #7853

On the Internet you can be anything you want. It's so strange that many people choose to be stupid.
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has 79.64 % from 231 votes. More jokes about: internet, life, stupid

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." "I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes" replies Watson. "And what do you deduce from that?" Watson ponders for a minute. "Well, Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe." But what does it tell you, Holmes?" Holmes is silent for a moment. "Watson, you idiot!" he says. "Someone has stolen our tent!"
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has 85.49 % from 735 votes. More jokes about: friendship, life, science, stupid, wine
I am often asked, "Is google a man or a women?" My simple answer is: It's a woman because it won't let you finish your sentence without making a suggestion.
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has 73.80 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: internet, life
Justin Bieber got 100,000 retweets for tweeting "Live life full". That's just 3 random words. I'm going to try now. Jockstrap squirrel potatoes.
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has 73.45 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, internet, life, music
The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions. "Ever have an accident?" "Nope, nary a one." "None? You've never had any accidents." "Nope. Ain't had one. Never." "Well, you said in this form you were bitten by a snake once. Wouldn't you consider that an accident?" "Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."
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has 72.84 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: animal, cowboy, life, stupid
I use the internet to tell me what the weather's like. How do you do that? I carry my laptop outside and if it gets wet, I know it's raining!
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has 71.97 % from 89 votes. More jokes about: internet, stupid, technology, weather
My blonde girlfriend went to the doctors this morning and was told she had two weeks to live. She chose last week and this week.
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has 69.34 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: blonde, death, life, stupid, time
A reporter heard Bush and one of his underlings talking in the hallway: "Mr President, how do we know for sure Iraq has weapons of mass destruction?" Pres says "You think we’re stupid boy?" "We made copies of all the receipts!"
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: life, political, stupid
My life may be a mess but I know the difference between "Your" & "You're"-
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: insulting, life, stupid
No! You don't have "Bad luck". You have low IQ and you make bad decisions.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: insulting, life, stupid
Q: Does your mum like shopping on the Internet? A: No, the trolley keeps rolling off the top of the computer.
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has 55.11 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: computer, internet, stupid, technology, Yo mama