Prostitute 1: Tonight's my night I can smell c**k in the air.
Prostitute 2: Oh, sorry. I burped.
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Similar jokes
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When is the best time to bury that baby you killed?
When it starts talking to you again.
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I love cats – they taste just like chicken.
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Q: What do you call the sweat on your balls after having sex with your cousin?
A: Relative humidity.
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Did you here about the man that died from eating Rocky Mountain Oysters?
The bull must have drug him a mile!
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Q: How do you recycle a condom?
A: Turn it inside out and shake the f**k out of it.
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Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period?
A. Finger painting.
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Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
A: You can't touch that toilet, it's art.
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A man goes into a psychiatric hospital to visit one of his buddies.
As he is walking out he notices a guy pretending to be swinging a hockey stick.
Curious, he asks: "What are you doing?"
The guy replies: "I'm Wayne Gretzky, and I'm practicing my shot."
Satisfied with the answer the visitor moves on down the hall.
He notices another guy pretending to be playing golf.
Curious, he asks: "What are you doing?"
The guy replies: "I'm Tiger woods and I'm practicing my golf."
Satisfied with this response the visitor again moves on down the hall.
He then sees another guy sitting in a chair in the nude with a jar of peanuts beside him.
This guy takes a peanut, places it on his dick, waits a minute, then flicks into his mouth.
Again, curious he asks: "What are you doing?"
The guy replies: "I'M FUCKING NUTS!"
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Silence is golden.
Unless you have an infant.
Then its probably blue.
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A woman walks into a restaurant and sits down.
As she bends down to reach into her purse for her wallet, she farts loudly with the waiter right behind her.
She sits abruptly back up, glares at the waiter and shouts “Stop that!”
To which the waiter replies, “Sure, which way did it go?”
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