Joke #8358

Q: What do you call a Shih-Tzu mixed with a poodle? A: A Shih-Tzpoo.
Vote: has 39.32 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
Vote: has 56.50 % from 42 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What's the hardest thing about a sex change from a man to a woman? A: Inserting the anchovies
Vote: has 26.93 % from 45 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer? A: The taste
Vote: has 65.11 % from 103 votes. Send joke:
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A blonde buys a used sports car. However, during the first joy ride, the engine jerks and the car slows to a stop. The blonde calls a tow truck. The mechanic sets to work, and 10 minutes later, the car is running again. "What was the matter?" she asks. "Simple really, just sh*t in the carburetor" he replies. Taken aback she asks, "Oh, how many times a week do I have to put that in?"
Vote: has 46.87 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
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1 woman and 9 men shipwreck on a deserted island. After one week, the woman, disgusted by the things she was doing, kills herself. After another week, the men, disgusted by the things they were doing, buried her. After another week, the men, more disgusted by the things they were doing, dug her up.
Vote: has 64.23 % from 32 votes. Send joke:
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As she lay there dozing next to me a voice inside my head kept saying, "Relax, you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients." But another voice kept saying, "Howard, you are a veterinarian."
Vote: has 71.97 % from 486 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job? A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:
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One day two deaf-mutes meet on the street. They had been friends in school but had lost touch over time. They used sign language to catch up on old times. Through the course of conversation one of the deaf-mutes learned the other had learned to speak and was no longer mute. This amazed the fellow that was still mute and he asked about the procedure. His friend gave him the doctor's card and went on his way. The deaf mute wasted no time and went straight to the doctor's office. The doctor informed the procedure took 26 days and cost one million dollars. The man handed the doc his insurance card and begged the doctor to start the treatment that day. The doctor had the man strip and lay over the examination table. The doctor went to his closet and took out a bucket of mayonnaise and a broom handle with a door knob on the end. The doc got a running start and shoved the mayonaise covered door knob up the deaf-mute's ass. The mute screamed,"AY!AY!AY!" The doctor said,"very good we will work on the B's tomorrow."
Vote: has 76.54 % from 51 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
Vote: has 33.60 % from 57 votes. Send joke:
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A man joins the navy and is shipped out immediately to an aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The captain is showing the new recruit around the ship, when the recruit asks the captain what the sailors do to satisfy their urges when they're at sea for so long. "Let me show you," says the captain. He takes the recruit down to the rear of the ship where there's a solitary barrel with a hole in it. "This'll be the best sex you'll ever have. Go ahead and try it, and I'll give you some privacy." The recruit doesn't quite believe it, but he decides to try it anyway. After he finishes up, the captain returns. "Wow! That was the best sex I've ever had! I want to do it every day!" "Fine. You can do it every day except for Thursday." "Why not Thursday?" "That's your day in the barrel."
Vote: has 79.60 % from 430 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: air force, dirty, disgusting, navy, sex