Joke #7248

Q: Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets? A: He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A farmer gets a phone call from his son. "I've run over a pig and its stuck under the tractor still alive." "Shoot it," says the farmer, "and then bury it." About 20mins later he gets another call..." "Done that, what should I do with his speed camera and motorbike?"
Vote: has 78.89 % from 142 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
What's pink and red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes.
Vote: has 30.11 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.
Vote: has 50.89 % from 153 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, black humor, disgusting
When you're neckin' with yer honey And your nose is kinda runny You might think it's funny... But it's not.
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period? A. Finger painting.
Vote: has 35.26 % from 110 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, lesbian, sex
Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he has to take a dump. "Well, go in the bushes." "What should I use to wipe my ass?" "Use a dollar bill." A few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s**t all over his hands. "What happened?" asks his friend. "I didn't have a dollar bill, so I used four quarters."
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, hunting, money
Two gay men are walking down the street trying to bum a ride. A truck driver picks them up. After a while the first gay man asked in a very gay voice, "Please sir can I fart?" The truck driver then says, "Yeah sure who cares." So the gay guy goes "POOF". Then the second gay man asks if he can fart. The truck driver says he doesn't care and the second gay man went ''poof''. Then the big truck driver goes to the gay men and says, "Ok gentlemen can I fart?" The gay men say right on and the truckdriver lets it blow. The fart was huge and smelly and loud. The gay men then say, "He is obviously a virgin."
Vote: has 56.92 % from 37 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, gay
Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They put up a sign reading: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology." The town council was not too happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to: "Hysterias and Posteriors." This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." No go! Next they tried "Catatonics and Colonics" Thumbs down again. Then came, "Manic-Depressives and Anal-Retentives." But is was still not good! So they tried: "Minds and Behinds" "Analysis and Anal Cysts" "Nuts and Butts" "Freaks and Cheeks" "Loons and Moons" "Lost Souls and Ass Holes" None worked. Almost at their wits' end, the doctors finally came up with a title they thought might be accepted by the council: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Odds and Ends." APPROVED!
Vote: has 75.90 % from 75 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, work
Q: What do the Starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common? A: They both circle Uranus searching for Klingons.
Vote: has 77.83 % from 71 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
Two guys were working at a sawmill one day when one of the guys got too close to the blade and cut off his arm. His buddy put the severed arm in a plastic bag and rushed it down to the hospital to get re-attached. The next day he goes to see his chum, and finds him playing tennis. "Incredible!," says his friend. "Medical science is amazing." Another month goes by and the same two guys are again at the sawmill working when the same guy gets too close to the spinning blade and this time his leg gets cut off. Again his buddy takes the leg, puts it in a plastic bag and takes it to the hospital to get re-attached. The next day, he goes down to see his chum and finds him outside playing football. "Incredible!," says his friend. "Medical science is amazing!" Well another month goes by and again the same two friends are at the mill cutting wood when suddenly the same guy bends down too close to the blade and off comes his head. Well his friend takes the head, puts it in a plastic bag, and heads to the hospital to get it re-attached. The next day he goes to see his friend but can't find him. He sees the doctor walking down the hall and says, "Doc, where is my friend? I brought him in yesterday." The doctor thinks for a minute and says, "Oh yeah, some idiot put his head in a plastic bag and he suffocated."
Vote: has 64.76 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, football, hospital, sport, work