Joke #8397

I need your help making a cream sauce.
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has 29.66 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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There are an older brother and a younger sister. The sister went to the bathroom while the brother was in the bathroom. The sister asks the brother if she could play with his dick and he says yeah. A few weeks later there was a big storm and the sister goes to the brother's room and asked the brother if she could play with Mr.Cuddles he says no. Then the sister said that she would tell on him so a little pissed of he says yes. After a while, the parents hear a scream. They rush to the brother's room and asks the sister what happened she said "Mr.Cuddles spat on me so I bit his head off."
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has 56.20 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty, family, sex, time
"For love on the first sight, there's a tremendous medicine!" "What medicine?" "To get another look...!"
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has 57.69 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love
Q: Why shouldn't Men using iron supplements take Viagra? A: It may cause them to spin around and point north.
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has 59.89 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, viagra
Q: What do women and airplanes have in common? A: They both have a cockpit.
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has 66.46 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: airplane, dirty, women
I had to get an Xbox controller tattooed on my vagina. So my boyfriend would play with me for a change.
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has 58.01 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: dirty, technology
Undertaker to bereaved husband. When did you 1st notice your wife was dead? Well he replies, "The s*x was the same but the dishes were starting too pile up."
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has 73.48 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: dirty
The proprietor of an adult store steps out to run a few errands and leaves his employee in charge. A woman comes in and wants to purchase a dildo. She looks at the shelf behind the register. "How much for the white one?" "$10." "How much for the black one?" "$20." She buys the white one. A little later , another woman comes in and also wants to buy a dildo. After asking the clerk for prices, she decides on the black one. A third lady comes in for a dildo. She checks the price of the white one , the black one and asks about the plaid one. She makes her purchase and leaves.The proprietor returns and asks how things went. "Great! I sold a white one, a black one, and I got thirty buck for your thermos!"
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has 58.86 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: dirty, masturbation, money, women
Q: When does a cub become a boy scout? A: When he eats his first Brownie.
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has 40.17 % from 86 votes. More jokes about: dirty
There were these two guys working late in a morgue, when one guy said, “Hey man there is a woman in there with a shrimp in her vagina!” The other asked, “What is a shrimp doing a dead woman's vagina? Let me go see.” Both of them went in the room with the woman, and they both curiosly looked. Finally, the second man said, “You idiot, this ain't no shrimp it's a clitoris.” And the other man replied, “Well, it tasted like shrimp to me.”
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has 62.61 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: dirty
At the court of a small provincial town, a lawyer calls his first witness, an old woman around 80 and he asks her with a professional style: "Do you know me, Mrs. Rowland?" "Of course, I know you Mr. Smith! says the old woman. I know you since you were little, and I have to confess that I am very disappointed in you. You lie, you cheat on your wife repeatedly, you gossip about your clients. Of course, I know you!" Speechless, by the unexpected answer, the lawyer points with his finger on the other side of the court room and says: "Do you know the defense lawyer?" "Oh, yes! I know Mr. Soft as well. I was holding him in my arms when he was a baby, and I can say that I am disappointed in him, too. He’s a drunk and a gamester. He finds it hard to develop a normal relationship with anyone and he is one of the worst lawyers of our town!" At that point, the Chairman interrupts the process and demands from the two lawyers to approach the bench. When they do, he bends over and whispers to them: "If any of you jerks, asks if she knows me, you’re screwed!"
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has 82.15 % from 156 votes. More jokes about: dirty, drunk, lawyer, relationship, wife