They put one man on the moon. Why can’t they put them all there?
Men are like.....Weather. Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?" "Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?" The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
What's the difference between an intelligent man and a UFO? I don't know, I've never seen either one.
Q: How can you tell when a man is dead? A: He stays stiff for more than two minutes.
Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Dogs are man's best friend. So which is the dumber sex?
Why do doctors slap babies' butts right after they're born? To knock the penises off the smart ones.
If women knew what men were really thinking, they'd never stop slapping them.
Why does a penis have a hole at the end? So guys can be open-minded.
A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."