Joke #8754

Yo' Mama is so skanky, her dildo came with jumper cables.

Yo' mama so fat, she uses epileptic boys as vibrators!

Two men were talking: First : "Can U put the word 'penis' in a sentence?" Second: "Yo mama's pussy."

A guy who was in the Air Force had just spent a year unaccompanied in Shemya, Alaska. The first night home, he told his wife he had something to show her. "I've mastered the art of mind over matter. Just watch this!" And with that he dropped his trousers and shorts and stood before her in his altogether. "D**k, ten-HUT!" And with that, his d**k sprang to full erection. "D**k, at EASE!" And his d**k deflated again. "That was amazing," said his wife. "Can I bring over our neighbor to show her?" The guy responded that he didn't mind at all, since he was proud of his accomplishment. So his wife brought back a delicious looking woman. "D**k, ten-HUT!" And his penis sprang up. "D**k, at EASE!" Nothing. "D**k, at EASE!" Still nothing. "For the last time, D**k at EASE!" Frustratingly enough, nothing happened. Embarrassed, he ran off to the bathroom. Worried, his wife ran after and found that he was vigorously masturbating. "What are you doing?" "I'm giving this guy a dishonorable discharge!"

Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures.

Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they? A: His left hand and his right hand.

Yo mamas so fat she fits on both sides of the bed.

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

I met a girl who used masturbate to 2 girls 1 cup. And that kids, is how j met your mother.

While talking to girl: "Hey, I heard an interesting stat the other day. They said that 80% of women masturbate in the shower. Know what the other 20% do?" "No, what?" "Yea, I figured you were in the first group."

Your mom's so dumb, she threw the dog and told the stick to fetch!