Why do white people have pets?
Because the aren't allowed black people anymore...
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Q: What is the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler?
A: Michael Phelps can finish a race.
Life Lemons Saying:
White Guy: When Life gives you lemons enjoy them with friends.
Black Guy: When Life gives you lemons sell them, buy a gun, point it at life and say "More lemons mother Fucker".
A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a Chinese man and punches him in the face.
"Owch!" the Chinese man says.
"What was that for?"
"That was for Pearl Harbor," the Jewish man says.
"But I'm Chinese!" "Chinese, Japanese, what's the difference?"
And the Jewish man sits back down.
Then, the Chinese man walks up to the Jewish man and punches him in the face.
"Ouch!" the Jewish man says. "What was that for?"
"That was for the Titanic," the Chinese man says.
"But that was an iceberg!"
"Ice berg, Goldberg, what's the difference?"
How do you tell when time is reversing?
When a Jew drops a coin on the ground.
American tourist in Moscow found himself needing to get rid of a large supply of garbage from his recent stay at an apartment. After a long search, he just couldn't find any place to discard of it. So, he just went down one of the side streets to dump it there.
Yet, he was stopped by a Moscow police officer, who said, "Hey you, what are you doing?"
"I have to throw this away," replied the tourist.
"You can't throw it away here. Look, follow me," the policeman offered.
The police officer led him to a beautiful garden with lots of grass, pretty flowers, and manicured hedges. "Here," said the cop, "dump all the garbage you want."
The American shrugs, opens up the large bags of garbage, and dumps them right on the flowers.
"Thanks for giving me a place to dump this stuff. This is very nice of you. Is this Russian courtesy?" asked the tourist.
"No. This is the American Embassy."
Q: Why did the Republican cross the road?
A: There was a black guy on the first side.
Vote:
There is a nigger and a Mexican in a car. Who is driving?
Nethier, the cop is.
What do you get when you mix a nigger and an octopus?
I don't know, but it picks the hell out of cotton
Vote:
What’s black with three feets?
A piano!
Q: What do you call a black and white thing rolling down a hill
A: A maori and a segull fighting over a fishhead.
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