An American was hopelessly lost in the Highlands and wandered about for nearly a week.
Finally, on the seventh day he met a kilted inhabitant.
"Thank heaven I’ve met someone," he cried. "I’ve been lost for the last week."
"Is there a reward out for you?" asked the Scotsman.
"No," said the American.
"Then I’m afraid you’re still lost," was the reply.
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Life Lemons Saying:
White Guy: When Life gives you lemons enjoy them with friends.
Black Guy: When Life gives you lemons sell them, buy a gun, point it at life and say "More lemons mother Fucker".
A white man walking down a beach kicks up a lamp, with hope he rubs the lamp.
Sure enough a genie pops out, and says, "I will grant you 3 wishes but be warned every black person in the world will get double what you wish."
After a thought he says he's got it.
"My first wish is i want a million dollars."
Genie "your wish has been granted and every black person now has 2 million dollars."
Man "Ok my second wish i want 10 thousand acres Genie.."
Granted but every black person in the world now has 20 thousand acres.
"And now you have but one wish."
"The man replies with my final wish... i wish you to beat me half to death."
Q: Why did they invent white chocolate?
A: So all black kids could get their faces messy too.
Vote:
Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas?
A: So they'll have something to unwrap.
Q: Why do white people scare black people?
A: Cause they always try kill your ass.
Vote:
Q: What happens when a black girl gets pregnant?
A: Her nigga runs away.
Vote:
How do you know if you've walked into the wrong Chinese bookstore?
It'll be called "Wong Fook Hing Book Store".
How do you get a Jewish girl's number?
You pull up her sleeve.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone.
Wing, Wing, Halo