Joke #9201

A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17." The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a show of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17. Every hand went up. The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying."
Vote:
has 78.81 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: school

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information" "To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted. "It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.
Vote:
has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: school, science, student
Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I". Student: I is the.... Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I". Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
Vote:
has 78.59 % from 261 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
Teacher: "I will call your parents!" Elementary student: "No! I’ll be a good boy!" Junior High School Student: "Pffff… Anyway…" High School Student: "Send my mother my greetings!"
Vote:
has 72.26 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: school, student, teacher
What kind of food do maths teachers eat? Square meals!
Vote:
has 52.05 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: school
Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher said, it was a peace of cake.
Vote:
has 56.50 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: school
Eleven year old’s environmental studies essay on the effect of oil pollution: "When my mum opened a tin of sardines last night it was full of oil and all the sardines were dead."
Vote:
has 74.27 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: age, death, school
The headmistress at a girls' prep school in the old South (circa 1959) calls down to the army base and speaks with one of the officers: "We're having a social here at school and I was wondering if you could send some of your nice young men to attend." "Why of course," the Lieutenant answers. "Just one thing," says the lady. "Of course you'll make sure there aren't any Jews there." "Why of course," the Lieutenant answers. On the day of the dance, a bus pulls up from the base. Out comes a platoon of black GIs. The schoolmistress is quite distressed. "Why, why, there must be some mistake," she says to a burly black Master Sergeant. "Why heck no, ma'am," he replies. "Lt. Goldberg NEVER makes a mistake!"
Vote:
has 57.27 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: jewish, military, school, student, time
Teacher: Students draw a picture of bacteria. Student: Here it is Mam! Teacher: Where? It Is Blank. Student: you told that bacteria cannot be seen with naked eye!
Vote:
has 78.93 % from 223 votes. More jokes about: school, student, teacher
Dad: "I heard you missed school yesterday." Little Johnny: "Not a bit."
Vote:
has 64.23 % from 253 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, school
John: Knock, knock. Justin: Who’s there? John: Gladys. Justin: Gladys, who? John: Gladys the weekend—no homework!
Vote:
has 45.52 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: school