Q: What is height of Suicide? A: A dwarf jumping from the footpath on the road.
I bet Rosa Parks killed it in musical chairs.
Woman patient: "Doctor I was suffering so much that I wanted to die." Doctor: "You did the right thing to call me."
What is a cannibal's favorite food? Baked Beings.
Q: What did the deaf, blind, mute girl get for Christmas? A: Cancer.
What does the cannibal do just after he dumped his girlfriend? Wiped his ass.
My grandfather can no longer do the things he loved to do as a teenager. Flying planes, bombing Germans...
"Excuse me, how do I get to the hospital quickly?" "Just stand in the middle of the road for a while."
Q: Whats the difference between a box full of dead babies and a cadillac? A: I don't have a cadillac in my garage.
Why is there always hot water at childbirth? In case of a stillbirth, soup.
How are a lawyer and a prostitute different? The prostitute stops fucking you after you’re dead.