Joke #9529

In the medical community, death is referred to as "Chuck Norris Disease".
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, health

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Vote: has 85.28 % from 936 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy's window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube." The man says, "Sorry officer I can't do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I'll have a really bad asthma attack." "Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample." "I can't do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I'll bleed to death." "Well, then we need a urine sample." "I'm sorry officer I can't do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I'll get really low blood sugar." "Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line." "I can't do that, officer." "Why not?" "Because I'm too drunk to do that."
Vote: has 84.80 % from 207 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cop, death, drunk, health
There was three people approaching the gates of heaven But there was only one place left. The gate keeper asked the first man what happened to him because the one with the worst death would go inn. The first man said: "Well imagine that I expected my wife was having an affair, so I got home early to surprise her. I found her in the bathroom with a towel round her so I knew she wasn't having a shower so I search the apartment and found 10 fingers hanging from the window sill. So I started bashing away at them. When he fell god must have loved him, because he lived. So I threw a refrigerator at him. After all the excitement I died of a heart attack." That's horrific said the gate keeper, he asked the second man how he died and he said. "Well imagine this I was riding one of those stationary bike on the top of our apartment building but it went wrong I feel down and grabbed some ones window sill. Then some idiot started bashing ar my fingers then I fell but god must have loved me because i lived then -SHANNOOOWWWW- a refrigerator plunged down at me" That is to horrific. He asked the third man how he died and he said. "Well imagine that I was naked in a refrigerator..."
Vote: has 84.13 % from 154 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, health, heaven, life, wife
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
Vote: has 83.78 % from 229 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain...the snake died.
Vote: has 83.62 % from 59 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him, so he tracked down nothing and killed it.
Vote: has 81.69 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris knows how to kill you in more ways than you know how to die.
Vote: has 81.28 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris was once tested for steroids. The results came back positive. When confronted with this information, Chuck Norris chuckled and said, "Of course, what do you think they make steroids from?"
Vote: has 80.98 % from 77 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Chuck Norris' pulse-rate is measured on the Richter Scale.
Vote: has 80.94 % from 57 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 80.60 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, women