Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
Mess with Chuck Norris, you get roundhouse kicked.
Chuck Norris roundhoused some wannabe cop named Agent Sasevel so hard that it rearranged the letters of his name to Steven Seagal.
There was a competition of arm wrestling between Chuck Norris and Superman. And guess what, the loser had to wear his undies over his pants!
Chuck Norris invented the internet so that he could reach his enemies, preferably ninjas.
The creation of a perfect sphere became possible after Chuck Norris became enraged with a rubix cube and roundhouse kicked the corners off it.
Chuck Norris doesn't use anti-virus. Viruses use anti-Chuck Norris.
In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague. The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
Chuck Norris does not open doors. Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him