Joke #9660

Q: Why did the lumber truck stop? A: To let the lumber jack off.
Vote:
has 56.20 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A woman and baby are in the doctors surgery, the doc is concerned about the babys weight, "Is he bottle fed or breast fed? The woman replies, "Breast fed." The doc gets her to strip down to her waist so he can examine her breasts. He pinches her nipples and sucks and rubs both breasts for a while ... "No wonder the baby is underweight, you have no milk." Woman replies, "I know, Im his granny ... but Im glad I came!"
Vote:
has 78.89 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, women
A guy went to a whore house and asked the lady if she had a woman that could handle 16 inches. "Hmm," said the madam. "I'm not sure. Try the first door on the right." So the guy went inside, stuck it in, and immediately heard screams. "It's too big! Take it out!" So he went to the madam. "No, really. I need someone who can handle 16 inches." "Hmm," said the madam. "Try the last door." So the guy went inside, stuck it in, and had the time of his life, surprised that there was no scream at all. In fact, he heard no sounds at all. Puzzled, he finished up and pulled out. "Talk to me, baby." "Moo."
Vote:
has 75.38 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, life
One night a little girl walks in on her parents having sex. The mother is going up and down on the father and when she sees her daughter looking at them she immediately stops. “What are you doing, Mommy?” The mother too embarassed to tell her little girl about sex so she makes up an answer. “Well, sweetie, sometimes daddy’s tummy gets too big so I have to jump up and down on it to flatten it out.” The little girl replies, “Well, mommy you really shouldn’t bother with that.” The mother has a confused look on her face, “Why do you say that sweetheart?” The little girl replies, “Because mommy, everytime you leave in the morning, the lady next door comes over and blows it back up.”
Vote:
has 85.23 % from 2850 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what that pussy needs.
Vote:
has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: cat, communication, dirty, sex
Q: What did one tampon say to the other? A: Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.
Vote:
has 38.94 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: dirty
How do lesbians handle their liquor? By the ears. (Lick her)
Vote:
has 38.26 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: dirty, lesbian
Q: How can you spot the blind guy in a nudist colony? A: It's not hard.
Vote:
has 82.99 % from 350 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A total naked woman rushed in a taxi. The taxi driver turned back and stared at her so keenly. The woman asked the taxi driver, "Why are you staring at me that way, haven't you ever seen a naked woman?" The taxi driver replied, "No, I just wonder where you have my money."
Vote:
has 85.29 % from 353 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar that reads: CHEESEBURGER: $1.50 CHICKEN SANDWICH: $2.50 HAND JOB: $10.00 He walks up to the bar and beckons one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks. "Can I help you?" she asks. "I was wondering," whispers the man. "Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?" "Yes," she purrs. "I am." The man replies, "Well, wash your hands. I want a cheeseburger."
Vote:
has 85.65 % from 1412 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, food, money
I told my crush at school, "If you love me, come wearing red tomorrow." The next day she came in wearing black! When she dropped her pen and she bent over to pick it up, I got a look up her skirt at her red thong. Moral of the story: she really loves me underneath it all.
Vote:
has 84.64 % from 1070 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love