Chuck Norris is the reason why George Michael is never gonna dance again.
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
When Miley Cyrus is naked and licks a hammer it's "art" and "music"... but when I do it, I'm "wasted" and "have to leave Home Depot".
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
Newton's 3rd Law never applies to Chuck Norris.
Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
I watched Justin Bieber get shot in CSI and my brother asked "Why are you crying?" I said "Because he didn't die in real life"
Q: What is the sound of Chuck Norris clapping one hand? A: Thunder.
Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
Taylor Swift waved at a boy yesterday and he didn't wave back... So she will have a new album coming out tomorrow.
Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.