What goes: "Click-is that it? Click-is that it? Click-is that it?" A blind person with a rubix cube.
Piranhas in the aquarium: sink your finger, lose your finger-game!
A golfer walks into the clubhouse of the local country club. He tells the golf pro behind the counter that he wants to do 18 and he is going to need a caddy. The golf pro informs him that the country club is running a promotion and if he tries out one of their experimental robot caddies, he can golf for free. The golfer agrees and takes out the robot. While on the golf course the robot caddy tells the golfer the wind speed, distance, even how hard to hit which club. He has the best game of his life. The next time the golfer goes to the country club, he tells the golf pro that he wants to do 18 holes and that he wants to get one of the robot caddies. He informs the golfer that they don't have the robot caddies anymore. The golfer, all upset, tells him how great they were and asks him what happened. The golf pro tells him that members were complaining that the sun would reflect of their metallic material and into their eyes. The golfer asks him why they didn't just paint the robots black? The golf pro said that they did paint them into black robot caddies, but the next day, 3 of them didn't show up and the other 3 robbed the pro shop.
How do you know when a baby is a dead baby? The dog plays with it more.
Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?" Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."
Chuck Norris just completed a full round of Golf... In 17 shots.
"My son, this is your senior year at school so your mom and I decided that you’re going to be a doctor." "But what are you saying dad? You know very well that I’m not in a position even to... kill a mosquito."
What do sick cannibals have for breakfast? Vitamin bills!
When Chuck Norris plays sudoku, he can put two same numbers in one square and still solve it right.
Chuck Norris's kill ratio on Call of Duty:Black Ops is infinity.
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson? He thought he would give him a paunch!