Why was cow afraid? He was a cow-herd.
A guy rings his boss and says "I can't come to work today" The boss asks why and the guy says "it's my eyes." "What's wrong with your eyes?" asks the boss. "I just can't see myself coming to work, so I'm going fishing instead..."
What happened to the lizard in the wizard's garden pond? He had him newt-ered.
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
White owl: who who. Black owl: who dat who dat.
What do you call it when one rabbit challenges another rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon? A hare dare.
It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
What is the best advice to give a worm? Sleep late.
What famous painting do cows love to look at? The Moona Lisa.
What's green with red spots? A frog with the chicken pox!