Why was cow afraid? He was a cow-herd.
Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.
A Koala and a Prostitiute had just finished having sex, so the Prostitute said, " All right, now give me my money!" The Koala replied, " Money, what for?" " What for?", the Prostitute growled, "Look up Prostitute in the dictionary and read what it says." So the Koala looked up prostitute in the dictionary. It said, "Prostitute- A woman who is paid to have sex." " Okay," said the Koala, " now you look up Koala in the dictionary, and read what it says." So the Prostitute looked up Koala in the dictionary. It said, "Koala- A furry animal who eats bush, then leaves."
An aquarium is just interactive television for cats.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a gorilla? An animal that puts you out at night.
What is a moo hoo for the bucket that goes at the back end of the cow? A tail pail.
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
What's the best way to make a bull sweat? Put him in a tight jumper !
A man asks a farmer near a field, "Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train." The farmer says, "Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you'll even catch the 4:11 one."
I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
What does a cow like to do by a campfire? Roast Moosmallows.