Joke #10665

How could the dolphin afford to buy a house? He prawned everything.
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A mean horseman went into a saddler's shop and asked for one spur. "One spur?" asked the saddler. "Surely you mean a pair of spurs, sir?" "No, just one," replied the horseman. "If I can get one side of the horse to go, the other side is bound to come with it!"
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Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
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Why was the lion-tamer fined? He parked on a yellow lion.
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What do cows usually fly around in? Helicowpters and Bulloons.
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What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig? (A teddy boar!)
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Will I ever be able to race my horse again the owner asked the vet. The vet replied, "You certainly will, and you ll probably beat her too!"
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Two women are on a transcontinental balloon voyage. Their craft is engulfed in fog, their compass gone awry. Afraid of landing in the ocean, they drift for days. Suddenly, the clouds part to show a sunlit meadow below. As they descend, they see a man walking his dog. One of the flyers yells to the figure far below, "Where are we?" The man yells back, "About a half mile from town." Once again, the balloonists are engulfed in the mist. One flyer says to the other, "He must have been a lawyer." The other says, "A lawyer! How do you know that?" The first says, "That’s easy. The information he gave us was accurate, concise, and entirely irrelevant."
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A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
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If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have? Plenty of milk.
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Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.
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