We ask the president to make laws. The president asks Chuck Norris.
After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. It was more "humane".
The November 5th Gunpowder Plot has been described as the 9/11 of its day. Staged by the government to discredit an entire religion.
Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin are having dinner. Trump orders a steak, and Putin orders the roast duck. The waiter, however, gets their plates mixed up. Trump does not wait, but rather just starts digging in. "Wow," Putin says. "Your hands make my duck look bigger."
Barack Obama was elected president of the USA because Chuck Norris said so. He remind him of Trivette...
Chuck Norris wins every political campaign, but politely declines the jobs.
When Teddy Rosavelt said there is nothing to fear but fear itself he obiously hadn't met Chuck Norris.
Q: How many Democrats does it take to clean up a disastrous Bush presidency? A: At least two!
Obama said, "Yes we can." Chuck Norris says, "I already did.".
Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 200. Ten to attach the bulb to the sun, and 190 to make the sun revolve around the Earth.