Q: Why did the programmer quit his job? A: Because he didn't get arrays.
Linux is like wigwam: no Gates, no Windows and Apache inside.
Q: What do you call a programmer from Finland? A: Nerdic.
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to start the November 5th bonfire? Zero Microsoft declares darkness to be a new standard.
How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? Yes.
A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt. The physicist said "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed". The engineer said "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong". The programmer said "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"
99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, 1 bug fixed... Compile again, 100 little bugs in the code.
Programming is like sex One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
To understand what recursion is, you must first understand recursion.