Q: What do two rednecks say after breaking up? A: Lets just be cousins.
Q: What do you call a redneck virgin? A: A 7 year old that can run faster than her brothers.
You might be a redneck if you're invited to a come as you party and you show up naked.
Two Reasons why it's so hard to solve a redneck murder: Firstly, the DNA all matches and secondly, there are no dental records.
You might be a redneck if you think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
Two rednecks from Arkansas were out hunting. They decided to separate to get a better chance of catching something. The first redneck says to the other, "If you get lost, fire three shots into the air every hour. That way I can pinpoint you and find you." After about three hours, the second redneck finds he is really lost. He decides to fire three shots into the air as the first man told him. He then waits an hour and does it again. He repeats this until he is out of ammo. The next morning, the first redneck finds the second with the help of forest rangers. He asks the second redneck man if he did what he told him to do. The redneck answers, "Yes, I fired three shots into the air every hour on the hour until I ran out of arrows."
Q: What do you call a redneck that's bursting into flames? A: A fire cracker.
Q: How do you circumcise a redneck? A: You kick his sister in the jaw.
You might be a redneck if your mother carries a lug nut wrench for a toothpick.
For a weddin' present Ledbetter gave his son Amos two hundred dollars. Two weeks later he asked him, "W'atcha do with the money, son?" "Ah bought me a wristwatch, Pappy!" answered the boy. "Yew dumb ignoramous!" yelled his father. "Yew should 'av bought yourself a rifle!" "A rifle? What fer?" "Suppos'n one day yew cum home and find some guy sleepin' wid yore wife," explained the older redneck. "W'atcha gonna do? Wake him up and ask him what time it is?"