The best redneck jokes

You might be a redneck if you think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
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has 70.49 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food, redneck
You know you're a redneck if your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back.
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has 70.45 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: redneck, stupid
You might be a redneck if the Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
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has 70.03 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Halloween, redneck, wife
Two Virginia rednecks go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment - the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. I mean they spend a fortune! The first day they go fishing, but they don't catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men catches a fish. As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realize that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred bucks?" The other guy says, "Wow! Then it's a good thing we didn't catch any more!"
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has 70.02 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: fish, money, redneck, stupid, travel
You know you're a redneck when your mom, dad, aunt, and uncle are two people.
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has 69.86 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: family, redneck
The July temperature in Joplin climbed over the one hundred mark. Despite the scorching heat, Bozell was outside painting his house. A passerby stopped for a moment to watch him and then asked, "How cum yer wearin' two jackets?" "'Cause," said the redneck, "the directions on the can say ta put on two coats!"
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has 69.55 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: mean, redneck, vulgar, weather
Would you take a bullet for the last person you had sex with? Anything for the family.
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has 69.44 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty, family, redneck, sex
Two Yankee boys were driving through the South and was stopped by a State Trooper. The trooper walked up to the open driver’s window, reached in, and slapped the driver on the side of his head. "What did you do that for?" the driver asked. "I don’t know how yall do it up north but here in Alabama, you have your drivers license ready when I walk up to the car." The trooper took the license when it was offered, walked back to his unit and then returned the license to the driver. He then walked around to the passenger side of the car and tapped on the window. When the passenger rolled the window down, the trooper reached in and slapped the passenger on the side of the head. "What did you do that for?" asked the startled passenger. "Well," responded the trooper, "I didn’t want you to be disappointed. You’ll get about two miles down the road and then say, 'I wish that redneck woulda tried that with me!'"
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has 67.46 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, driving, redneck, travel
Half dressed redneck couple sitting on a couch watching the news on TV with man's arm around the woman. The man says "Lookit them homo-sekshuls a ruining the sanctity of our institution. "We oughta go to San Francisco just to show them liberals that marriage means one man, one woman. " "Right, Darlin." The woman replies, "That's right, Daddy."
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has 62.79 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: couple, family, redneck, relationship, travel
Cloyd went to a Charleston dentist complaining his gums had shriveled up and his teeth were falling out. After examining him, the dentist said, "Your mouth is really bad. Do you brush?" "Ah sure do!" replied Cloyd. "Everee single day!" "What do you brush with?" asked the dentist. "Preparation H," said the redneck.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: dentist, doctor, medical, redneck, stupid
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