The best redneck jokes

Cloyd went to a Charleston dentist complaining his gums had shriveled up and his teeth were falling out. After examining him, the dentist said, "Your mouth is really bad. Do you brush?" "Ah sure do!" replied Cloyd. "Everee single day!" "What do you brush with?" asked the dentist. "Preparation H," said the redneck.
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has 64.23 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: dentist, doctor, medical, redneck, stupid
Half dressed redneck couple sitting on a couch watching the news on TV with man's arm around the woman. The man says "Lookit them homo-sekshuls a ruining the sanctity of our institution. "We oughta go to San Francisco just to show them liberals that marriage means one man, one woman. " "Right, Darlin." The woman replies, "That's right, Daddy."
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has 63.26 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: couple, family, redneck, relationship, travel
Marley stopped at the town barbershop for a haircut. After thirty-five minutes of snipping and cutting, the barber held a mirror behind Marley's head. "How you like it?" asked the barber. "Real fine," said the redneck. "But how 'bout making it a little longer in the back?"
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: beauty, redneck, stupid, time
Two rednecks, Bubba And Billy Bob, were walking through a pasture. Bubba sees a sheep caught up in a fence and says to Billy Bob "I'm gonna get me some of that"! Bubba goes over and sticks the sheep's back feet in his rubber boots, unzips his pants and starts to have sex with the sheep. He looks over his shoulder at Billy Bob and says "Do you want some of this"? Billy Bob replies "yes let me see if I can get my shirt caught up in the fence".
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has 60.65 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, redneck, sex, stupid
Q: What do a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common? A: In the end, someone is going to lose a trailer.
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has 58.86 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: divorce, redneck
You might be a redneck if a police officer pulls you over to ask for your driver's license and your address is the county jail.
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has 58.67 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: cop, driving, prison, redneck
Moody was awakened by the telephone at four A.M. It was his Ku Klux Klan buddy, Crumm, calling long distance from Montgomery. "What's the matter?" asked Moody. "Are you in trouble?" "No!" said Crumm. "What do you want, then?" "Nothing!" "Then how come you are calling me in the middle of the night?" asked Moody. "Cause!" said the other redneck, "the rates are cheaper!"
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: money, phone, redneck
You might be a redneck if you're invited to a come as you party and you show up naked.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: party, redneck, stupid
Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a police roadblock!! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!" "Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers then peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat." "What fer?", asked Bubba. "Just let me do the talkin', OK?," said Earl. Well, they finished their beers, threw the empties out of sight & put label on each of their foreheads. When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?" "No, sir," said Earl while pointing at the labels. "We're on the patch."
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has 57.82 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, cop, redneck
Q: Did you hear about the redneck who was shooting craps? A: He blew a hole in the toilet.
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, redneck
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