The best stupid jokes

Two Generals were preparing for battle. The first General calls his aide and says "Bring me my red uniform!" The other General asks why he would wear a red uniform. The first General explains that if he gets wounded then his soldiers won't see the blood and lose their courage. The other General thinks about this, then calls to his aide "Bring me my brown uniform!"
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has 82.12 % from 188 votes. More jokes about: dirty, health, military, stupid, war
Yo momma so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
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has 82.01 % from 5648 votes. More jokes about: insulting, stupid, Yo mama
An airman in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a marine joke?" The guy next to him replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs, and I'm a marine. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, weighs 225, and he's a marine. The fella next to him is 6'5" tall, weighs 250, and he's also a marine. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?" The Airman says, "Nah, I don't want to have to explain it three times."
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has 81.42 % from 118 votes. More jokes about: air force, navy, stupid
Eight hours into his trial Paddy pleads guilty. "Why didn't you plead guilty at the beginning and save the court's time?" The judge demanded. "Well," Paddy responded, "until I heard all the evidence I thought I was innocent."
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has 81.36 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: prison, stupid, time
You're a redneck if: -You have more fingers than you do teeth -You cut your grass and find a car -You consider Denny's a Fancy Resturant -Your best Suit contains more than 5 colors -Your age is higher than your I.Q. -Your favorite pickup line is "Does this look infected to you?" -You ask your wife whether the spot on your neck is a boil or a mole and she replies "It's a gummy bear." -You have a family reunion and everyone in town shows up. -You say "Watch this" every time before you goto the hospital. -Your wife and ex-wife are sisters.
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has 81.36 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: car, family, hospital, redneck, stupid
A redneck calls up the White House and tells the receptionist: "I'd like to become the next President of the United States." The receptionist: "What are you, an idiot?" Redneck: "Why, is it required?"
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has 81.34 % from 186 votes. More jokes about: geography, phone, political, redneck, stupid
There were these two blonds and they locked their keys in their car. The one blonde says to the other, "What do we do? Do we get a coat hanger and pick the lock?" The other one replied, "No, people will think we're trying to break in." The other one said, "Well do we get a knife and cut the rubber and pop the lock?" The other one answered," No, people will think we're too stupid to use the coat hanger." The other one said, "Well we better think of something quick because it's starting to rain and the sunroof is open."
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has 81.30 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: car, communication, stupid, weather
Yo' Mama is so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.
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has 81.11 % from 2379 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, lawyer, stupid, Yo mama
I gave up my seat to a blind person in the bus. That is how I lost my job as a bus driver.
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has 81.05 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: driving, health, stupid, work
Yo momma so stupid that she brought a ruler to bed to see how long she could sleep.
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has 80.74 % from 2982 votes. More jokes about: insulting, stupid, Yo mama
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