The best stupid jokes

I asked the boss if I could get a raise, and he said, "Because of the fluctuational predisposition of your position's productive capacity as juxtaposed to the industry standards, it would be monetarily injudicious to advocate an increment." I said, "I don't get it." He said, "That's right."
Vote: has 78.55 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: management, money, stupid
An airman in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a marine joke?" The guy next to him replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs, and I'm a marine. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, weighs 225, and he's a marine. The fella next to him is 6'5" tall, weighs 250, and he's also a marine. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?" The Airman says, "Nah, I don't want to have to explain it three times."
Vote: has 78.47 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: air force, navy, stupid
Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.
Vote: has 78.47 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, communication, stupid, travel
Your mom is so stupid she tried to drown a fish.
Vote: has 78.42 % from 466 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fish, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
Yo mama is so stupid, she returned a doughnut cause it had a hole in it.
Vote: has 78.38 % from 505 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, stupid, Yo mama
Yo mama so stupid she tried to make an appointment with Dr.pepper
Vote: has 78.21 % from 614 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: stupid, Yo mama
A guy rang up to air port and said: "Do you mind me please to ask how long is from New York to Sanfransico? The lady replied "A moment..." Then the guy said "Thank you" and ceased conversation.
Vote: has 78.10 % from 83 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, men, stupid, time, travel
A man, during his night prays, asks God: "Oh, Lord... Why you’ve made women so beautiful?" God replies: "So you can love them, my child." "Fine, but my Lord, why you’ve made them so stupid?" "So that they can love you back, my child...!"
Vote: has 77.74 % from 87 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, god, love, men, stupid
Q: What do you get when you give a blonde a penny for her thoughts? A: Change.
Vote: has 77.74 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, money, stupid
A blonde was sick and tired of people making fun of her for being a blonde, so she decided to hang herself. A couple minutes later two men walk by and see her hanging by her wrists. "What are you doing." they ask her. So she replies "Hanging myself." The men are confused and asked "If you are hanging youself, you put the rope around your neck." The blond says "Duh....I tried that, I couldn't breath."
Vote: has 77.67 % from 230 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, death, stupid