The best stupid jokes

An airplane was about to crash. There were 4 passengers on board but only 3 parachutes. The 1st passenger said, "I am Stephen King , the best selling author of my time... My millions of fans need me , and i can't afford to die." So he took the 1st pack and left the planernThe 2nd passenger , Barack Hussein Obama, said , "I am the 44th President of the United States, and I am the smartest President in American history , so my people don't want me to die." He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane.rnThe 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10 year old schoolboy, "My son , I am old and don't have many years left, you have more years ahead so I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute." The little boy said , "That's okay , Your Holiness, there's a parachute left for you. America's smartest President took my schoolbag."
has 77.46 % from 208 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, death, money, stupid, time
Yo mama so stupid she tried to make an appointment with Dr.pepper
has 77.38 % from 732 votes. More jokes about: stupid, Yo mama
A man, during his night prays, asks God: "Oh, Lord... Why you’ve made women so beautiful?" God replies: "So you can love them, my child." "Fine, but my Lord, why you’ve made them so stupid?" "So that they can love you back, my child...!"
has 77.08 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: beauty, god, love, men, stupid
Your mom is so stupid she tried to drown a fish.
has 76.95 % from 575 votes. More jokes about: fish, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
A blonde bought a brand new car and decided to drive down from some place far off, to meet this friend. She reached there in a few hours. After spending a few days there, she decided to return, and called up her mother to expect her in the evening. But she didn't reach home in the evening and not the next day either. When she finally reached home on the third day, her distraught mother ran and asked her what happened? She got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "These car designers are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for going back!"
has 76.91 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, stupid, time, travel
Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
has 76.91 % from 251 votes. More jokes about: football, sport, stupid, Yo mama
A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor queries. "No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
has 76.89 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: baby, doctor, husband, phone, stupid
Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.
has 76.68 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: blonde, communication, stupid, travel
An airman in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a marine joke?" The guy next to him replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs, and I'm a marine. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, weighs 225, and he's a marine. The fella next to him is 6'5" tall, weighs 250, and he's also a marine. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?" The Airman says, "Nah, I don't want to have to explain it three times."
has 76.53 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: air force, navy, stupid
Yo mama is so stupid she tried to commit suicide by jumping out the basement window.
has 76.52 % from 519 votes. More jokes about: stupid, Yo mama
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