The best teacher jokes

Teacher: What happened in 1869? Student: Mahatma Gandhi was born. Teacher: What happened in 1873? Student: Gandhi was four years old
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has 65.52 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: kids, student, teacher, time
Little Johnny: "I've piss may I go out?" Teacher : "Piss is an impolite word instead you say I've number 1." Jimmy: "May I go out? I want to shit." Teacher: "Shit is also a bad word it is better to use number 2 instead." Ronald: "There is a wind in my belly give me please a number for it."
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has 65.22 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, kids, teacher, vulgar
One day the teacher was asking the class about there weekends. She asked sue, "how was your weekend?" "Good." Then little Johnny waved his hand "me, me, me." Finally giving in said, "what did you do this weekend?" "I rode in my wagon pulled by my dog and hit a steep hill. The wagon started going faster than the dog and the handle went up his ass." "Rectum is the word you're looking for," she says. "Rectum," said Johnny, "da man near killed him."
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has 65.20 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: communication, dog, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar
Q: Why was the guitar teacher arrested? A: For fingering a minor.
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has 64.59 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: music, prison, teacher, vulgar
Little Johnny was in bible study one morning. Sally was sleeping in front of johnny. The teacher asked Sally who our Lord and savior was. Little Johnny poked her in the butt with a pin and she screamed "Jesus Christ!" And fell back to sleep. A little while later the teacher asked Sally who created our world. Johnny poked her in the butt again and Sally screamed "oh my god!" And fell back to sleep. Later the teacher asked Sally what Eve said to Adam after they had their fifth child. Johnny poked her in the butt and Sally screamed "if you stick that thing in me one more time I'm gonna break it!"
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has 64.39 % from 166 votes. More jokes about: bible, god, little Johnny, teacher
Teacher: "Little Johnny can you say a sentence to use with dirty words? Little Johnny: "Yesterday my school was late so I had to run in order to reach on time." Teacher: "You didn't use any bad word in your sentence." Little Johnny: "Well, when I was running I farted many times!"
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has 64.10 % from 362 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, fart, little Johnny, teacher
Teacher: "Who knows 5+5=?" Little Johnny: "11" Teacher: "Take out your hand from trousers pocket and count with your fingers."
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has 63.76 % from 205 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, math, stupid, teacher
Why was the cannibal expelled from school? Because he kept buttering up the teacher.
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
At school one day, the teacher was trying to approach the topic of sex education and asked her students if they'd ever seen anything that was related to sex education on TV. Mary raised her hand and said she had seen a movie about women having babies. "Great," said the teacher, "that's very important." Then Judy raised her hand and told the teacher she had seen a TV show about people getting married. "Well, that has to do with it too," said the teacher. Then Johnny raised his hand and said he had seen a western where some Indians came riding over the hill and John Wayne shot them all. The teacher said, "Well, Johnny, that really doesn't have anything to do with sex education." "Yes it does," said Johnny, " it taught those Indians not to f**k with John Wayne."
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has 63.32 % from 149 votes. More jokes about: baby, little Johnny, school, sex, teacher
Teacher: Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour? Pupil: Because it can't sit down!
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has 62.91 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
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