The best teacher jokes

I hated my job as an origami teacher. Too much paperwork.
has 39.64 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher, work
Two men were talking about their wives. First: "I'm a teacher whenever we are in bed my wife says repeat please." Second: "I'm a driver when we are sexing she thinks I'm in a gas station so she screws my dick and says: 'fill it up super!'"
has 38.75 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, sex, teacher, work
Chuck Norris doesn't teach his kicks. They speak for themselves.
has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, teacher
One day a medical professor and his class were standing over a corpse and the professor said, "There are two things to being a medical forensicist. First: Don't fear anything." After saying that, the professor shoved his middle finger up the corpse's anus and licked it. He then told the class to do the same. After hesitating, they all did it. "Next," the professor said, "you have to have a key observation finger. Thus, I licked my index finger."
has 37.43 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: school, science, student, teacher
What is a teacher's favorite kind of music? Class-ical.
has 36.89 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: music, school, teacher
Little Johnny wasn't a very good at speller. One day, during a spelling exam, the teacher wrote the word "new" on the blackboard. "Now," she asked Johnny, "what word would we have if we placed a "K" in the front?" After thinking a few seconds, Johnny said, "Canoe?"
has 36.31 % from 198 votes. More jokes about: communication, little Johnny, school, teacher
One day a teacher asked the class, "What is the difference between a bird and a fly?" A student then replied, "A bird can fly but a fly cannot bird."
has 35.99 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, student, teacher, white people
Legendarily naughty Little Johnny sat in class quietly as the students were composing a poem with their teacher. When she asked for an F-word that rhymed with "duck" he waved his hand feverishly. The teacher frowned and passed him by. No kids, however, could offer her a solution. Finally she glared at Johnny and called on him. Johnny put on his devlish grin and said, "An F-word that rhymes with duck is...fluctuation." The teacher blurted out, "No Johnny, that's sucks! I'm so sick of telling you what a little frigging a**hole you are!"
has 35.90 % from 195 votes. More jokes about: duck, little Johnny, student, teacher
Teacher: "In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia?" Pupil: "Holding up the telegraph lines!"
has 34.91 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: phone, school, teacher, war
The following conversation took place in school. Teacher: "So we are all descended from Adam and Eve." Young kid: "My dad says we came from apes." Teacher: "That's probably true for your family Abdul."
has 34.57 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: communication, insulting, religious, school, teacher
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