The best teacher jokes

Little Johnny's teacher asks him, "If I have 5 cookies, and I give you 2, how many cookies do I have left?" Little Johnny replies, "Zero, you're giving me more than just 3 cookies. I'm taking all 5 baby!" The teacher just facepalms herself. "I can strongly suggest that you work on your math skills Johnny." the teacher suggests. "Oh I know math, one man plus one girl, subtract a condom, equals a baby!" Little Johnny says.
has 46.43 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, little Johnny, math, teacher
Fred came home from his first day at school. "Nothing exciting happened", he told his mother, "Except the teacher didn't know how to spell cat so I told her."
has 44.74 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: cat, school, teacher
When Chuck Norris was in kindergarden he made his teacher spit out her gum.
has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, teacher
Two men were talking about their wives. First: "I'm a teacher whenever we are in bed my wife says repeat please." Second: "I'm a driver when we are sexing she thinks I'm in a gas station so she screws my dick and says: 'fill it up super!'"
has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, sex, teacher, work
In high school, teachers had to raise up their hand to speak to Chuck Norris.
has 43.69 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, school, teacher
The absent-minded teacher paused to chat awhile with one of her students, then asked, "Which way was I going when I stopped to talk to you?" "That way", the student pointed. ''Good,'' said the teacher, ''then I've had my lunch."
has 43.46 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
One day, a young boy was asked by his teacher to tell him what the chemical formula for water was. The boy replied with "H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O". The Teacher was stunned. "That's not right, how did you come up with that?" The boy said, "Last week you said it was H2O!"
has 43.40 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: school, science, teacher
Chuck Norris has heard the actual voice of Charlie Brown's teacher...
has 42.73 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, teacher
Chuck Norris didn't go to school to learn, he went to teach.
has 42.13 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, school, teacher
A teacher asks her students if they're Yankees fans. All of the hands go up except for one student. "Okay, Bobby. What team are you a fan of?" "The Red Sox." "Why's that?" "Well, my parents are both Red Sox fans, so I'm a Red Sox fan too." "That's not a good answer, Bobby. If your parents were both morons, would you be a moron too?" "No, that would make me a Yankees fan!"
has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: football, sport, student, teacher
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