The best business jokes

A college business professor could not help but notice that one of his students was late to class for the third time that week. Before class ended he went around the room asking students some questions about the day's lecture. Of course, he made sure to pick on his tardy pupil. "And who was it that developed the theories behind communism?" the professor asked. "I don't know," the student said. "Perhaps if you came to class on time, Mr. Reebs, you would know," said the professor. "That's not true," the student replied. "I never pay attention anyway!"
Vote:
has 43.43 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: business, college, school, student
Me "Hi! Welcome to McDonald's! Can I take your Mcorder?" Boss "You don't have to put Mc in front of everything." Me "Oh okay. Hi! Welcome to Donalds! Can I take your order?" Boss "Get out."
Vote:
has 43.02 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: business, communication, customer service, management, work
A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then he asks the bartender to prepare another double martini. After he finishes that one, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and asks the bartender to bring another double martini. The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all Night long. But you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill." The man replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, then I know it's time to go home."
Vote:
has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, business, wife
Yo mama so stupid when I said I was going to the big apple she said bring me back one.
Vote:
has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: business, insulting, stupid, technology, Yo mama
Chuck Norris walked into the gold and silver pawn shop in Las Vegas. They made a deal. Chuck now owns the shop.
Vote:
has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: business, Chuck Norris
In an aeroplane flying to Melbourne a blonde girl leaves her seat and goes to the business class. The stewardess, who’ s watching her, gently asks her to see her ticket and tells her that she has to go back to her seat. But the blonde girl replies “I am young, beautiful, I travel to Melbourne and I’m staying here”. The stewardess goes to the cockpit and explains the copilot what happened. So he comes out of the cockpit and tries to explain to the blonde girl that she had to go back to her seat. And again the blonde girl says “I am young, beautiful, I travel to Melbourne and I’m staying here”. The copilot, confused, returns to the cockpit and explains the situation to the aircraft commander. “Don’t worry”, he says, “My wife is a blonde… I can hanlde it!”. So the commander, goes out, spots the blonde and whispers something in her ear. Suddenley, she stands up and says “Oh sorry mister…I didn’ t know…!” and runs back to her seat. “What the hell did you tell her?” asks the copilot who was watching the scene. “I told her that people in the business class are not flying to Belbourne”
Vote:
has 39.94 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: airplane, blonde, business, travel
What do nigger pimps and farmers have in common? They both need a hoe to stay in business!
Vote:
has 39.64 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: business, racist
What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1) No mind. 2) No business.
Vote:
has 37.27 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: business, men
Chuck Norris, Mr T and Arnold Swieznigger died in a plane crash they got to heavens door way and god asked them what there business is. Arnold replied "I want to be your right hand man". Mr T said "I wanna be your left hand man". Chuck Norris said "get the fuck out of my chair".
Vote:
has 36.81 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: airplane, business, celebrity, Chuck Norris
CEO frequently overheard mumbling, "Eeny, meeny, miney, moe." Windows XP shutdown screen reads, "It is Now Safe to Start Looking for Work." Company softball team downsized to chess team. Company president now driving a Hyundai. Giant yard sale in front of corporate headquarters.
Vote:
has 36.23 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: business, car, IT, management, work
<<<910
More jokes →
Page 9 of 10.