The best car jokes

Yesterday I accidentally hit a little kid with my car. It wasn't serious — nobody saw me.
Vote: has 67.10 % from 75 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, car, kids
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!" The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!" They each continue on their way, and ... as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road ... and dies immediately. If only men would listen...
Vote: has 66.96 % from 35 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, car, men, women
"I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a cow for my farm." "Well, wouldn't you look silly riding a cow?" "I d look a darn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!"
Vote: has 66.77 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, car
A Pontiac takes examinations for the driver’s licence for the fourth year in a row. The examiner asks him "So, you’re running on the street. You have a mountain on your right and there’s a cliff on your left. There are two women in your way; the one young and the other an old woman. Which one are you going to hit?" "Of course the old woman!" The examinet frustrated "I told you last year! You hit the brakes!"
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, car, life, old people, women
Much controversy surrounds Area 51, which is also known as Chuck Norris's playground. Those flying saucers are similar to our model cars and planes.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
At the age of 17, Chuck Norris was fired from his job in a car factory because he roundhouse-kicked a car in half.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, car, Chuck Norris, work
Why do ghetto people always name their kids things they cant afford like Diamond, Mercedes, Car Insurance?
Vote: has 66.68 % from 98 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, car, kids, racist
What do you call a mexican who's lost his car? Carlos.
Vote: has 66.64 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, mexican, racist
"Excuse me, how do I get to the hospital quickly?" "Just stand in the middle of the road for a while."
Vote: has 66.60 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, car, hospital, time
"My wife drives like thunder." "So fast?" "No, every minute she strikes a tree."
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, time, travel, wife