Q: Why is it good to have a Jewish car? A: It can stop on a dime, and pick it up for you too!
Why do ghetto people always name their kids things they cant afford like Diamond, Mercedes, Car Insurance?
Two blondes lock their keys in the car. One of the blondes tries to break into the car while the the other one watches. Finally the first blonde says "Darn, I can't get in the car!" The other blond replies, "keep trying, it looks like it is going to rain and the top is down".
The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?" said the officer. "I'm going to a lecture." the man said. "And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife." said the man.
I bought a Jewish sports car. Not only will it stop on a dime, it will pick it up too. I've heard they're gas guzzlers though.
When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
Q: How was break dancing invented? A: Little black kids stealing hub caps off of moving cars.
What do you call a mexican who's lost his car? Carlos.
A guy goes into a bar and sits down next to a guy who's obviously been drinking for a while. The drunk gets up from his stool to go to the bathroom and falls down 3 times. The guy says to himself "I'll help this guy get home safely" and helps him out to his car The guy falls down five more times. He drives him up to the address on his license, takes him up to the door. The guy falls down 8 times on the way...and rings the bell. A lady answers the door and says "Oh how nice, you brought home Harry. But what did you do with his wheelchair?"