The best car jokes

How would you get four reindeer in a car? Two in the front and two in the back. And how do you get four polar bears in a car? Take the reindeer out first.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, car
Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is working? A: Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, stupid
As a blonde crawls out of her wrecked car, the local sheriff asks her what happened. The blonde began, "It was the strangest thing! I looked up and saw a tree, so I swerved to the right. Then I saw another tree, so I swerved to left. Then there was another tree, and another and another ..." The sheriff thought for a minute and then said, "Mam ... I don't know how to tell you this, but the only thing even resembling a tree on this road for thirty miles is your air freshener."
Vote: has 62.44 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car
Chuck Norris bought out the Walt Disney Company with a car-wash token.
Vote: has 62.41 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
Vote: has 62.41 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris, weather
A guy who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over. "So," says the cop to the driver, "Where have you been?" "Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk. "Well," says the cop, "It looks like you've had quite a few drinks this evening." "I did all right," the drunk says with a smile. "Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms across his chest, "That a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?" "Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, car, cop, drunk, wife
Santa Claus arrives to a kindergarten and gives each child a present. Everybody received really cool presents – racing car models, ship models and similar. But one kid got only a pair of socks. A kid comes to him and teases him with his received brand new Formula 1 model and laughs at this socks-kid: LHey, what a shitty present you have received, look at my super car" said the kid offensively. "So what, at least I don't have cancer…"
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, kids, Santa
A Mexican and a nigger are riding in car. Who's driving? A cop!
Vote: has 61.73 % from 931 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, car, cop, racist
A blonde was trying to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had almost 230,000 miles on it. One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, “There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it’s not legal.” “That doesn’t matter,” replied the blonde, “if I can only sell the car.” “Okay,” said the brunette. “Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will ‘fix it’. Then you shouldn’t have a problem anymore trying to sell your car.” The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, “Did you sell your car?” “No,” replied the blonde, “Why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!”
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, money, stupid
Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over a 100 miles per hour. "Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel, "see any cops following us?" The blonde turned around for a long look. "As a matter of fact, I do." "Oh, NOOOO!" yelled the brunette. "Are his flashers on?" The blonde turned around again. "Yup...nope...yup...nope...yup..."
Vote: has 61.43 % from 45 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, cop