The best car jokes

What does Pontiac stand for? Poor Old Nigger Thinks It's A Cadillac!
Vote: has 61.93 % from 149 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, car
Q: Why did the blonde go to the dentist? A: Someone dented her car.
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, dentist, stupid
A Mexican and a nigger are riding in car. Who's driving? A cop!
Vote: has 61.41 % from 942 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, car, cop, racist
Yo momma's so old if she were a car it would be time to roll back her odometer.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, car, time, Yo mama
A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?" "Of course not, dear," replied the mother, "Why would you think that?" "The tombstone back there said... 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, death, lawyer, men
Yo mama teeth are so yellow when she smiles traffic slows down.
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, insulting, Yo mama
John asks his wife, Mary, what she wants to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new Mink Coat?” he asks. “Not really,” says Mary. “Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?” says John. “No,” she responds. “What about a new vacation home in the country?” he suggests. She again rejects his offer with a, “No thanks.” Frustrated he finally asks, “Well what would you like for your anniversary?” “John, I’d like a divorce,” answers Mary. John thinks for a moment and replies “Sorry dear, I wasn’t planning to spend that much.”
Vote: has 61.01 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: anniversary, car, divorce, men, wife
One night a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. The man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Meanwhile, all the other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. As soon as he pulled onto the street, the officer stopped him, read him his rights and administered the breathalyzer test to determine his blood-alcohol content. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
Vote: has 61.01 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, car, cop
Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
Vote: has 61.01 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, car, death, jewish, morbid
Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tire. Much to their relief she smiled and said, "Well, you missed a test today so take seats apart from one another and take out a piece of paper." Still smiling, she waited for them to sit down. Then she said, "First Question was which tire was flat?"
Vote: has 60.85 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, school, teacher