The best car jokes

Q: What do you call a car only British animals can drive? A: OxFord.
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has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, driving
How does a girl from Harlem practice safe sex? She locks the car doors.
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has 55.29 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: car, racist, sex
How do bulls drive their cars? They steer them.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
A redneck family shares one vehicle, the daughter asks her dad for the truck. The father says "okay, you know what to do." Then continues to lower his pants, the daughter says "daddy why's there shit on your dick." The father then replies "ohhhh, that's right honey, your brother has the truck."
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has 54.59 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: car, disgusting, family, redneck, sex
A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit. Finally the bee turned around and flew away. Why? The rabbit had two b's already.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
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has 54.56 % from 121 votes. More jokes about: black humor, car, death, jewish, morbid
When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
Q: What do a gay and a garbage truck have in common? A: Both take it in the rear.
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has 54.06 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: car, dirty, gay
Walking down the street, a man hears a voice: "Stop! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down and kill you." The man stopped; a big brick fell in front of him. The astonished man continued walking to the cross walk. The voice shouted, "Stop! If you take one more step, a car will run over you and you will die." The man stood still; a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. "Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?" "I am your guardian angel," the voice answered. "Oh yeah?" the man asked. "Where the hell were you when I got married last week?"
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has 53.92 % from 187 votes. More jokes about: car, death, marriage
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
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has 53.62 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, Chuck Norris, time
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