Q: What do you call a car only British animals can drive?
A: OxFord.
How does a girl from Harlem practice safe sex?
She locks the car doors.
Yo mamma so black when she gets in the car the oil light turns on.
Vote:
Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"
Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car?
A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit.
Finally the bee turned around and flew away.
Why?
The rabbit had two b's already.
Q: Why is it good to have a Jewish car?
A: It can stop on a dime, and pick it up for you too!
There are 4 guys in a car, 1 from Iowa,1 from Wisconsin, 1 from Florida, and 1 from Illinois.
The guy from Florida says "I’m tired of seeing oranges everyday" so he throws some oranges out the window.
So then the guy from Iowa says "I’m tired of seeing Corn everyday" so he throws some corn out the window.
The guy from Wisconsin is very inspired so he opens the door and pushs the guy from Illinois out of the car!
Q: What do a gay and a garbage truck have in common?
A: Both take it in the rear.
Walking down the street, a man hears a voice: "Stop! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down and kill you."
The man stopped; a big brick fell in front of him.
The astonished man continued walking to the cross walk.
The voice shouted, "Stop! If you take one more step, a car will run over you and you will die."
The man stood still; a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.
"Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?"
"I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.
"Oh yeah?" the man asked. "Where the hell were you when I got married last week?"