The best car jokes

Q: What do you call a car only British animals can drive? A: OxFord.
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has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, driving
How does a girl from Harlem practice safe sex? She locks the car doors.
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has 55.29 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: car, racist, sex
A police officer pulls over a car with a young blonde driver in it.... Cop: "Miss, this is a 65 MPH highway, why are you going so slowly?" Blonde: "Officer, I saw a lot of signs saying 22, not 65." Cop: "Oh miss, that's not the speed limit, that's the name of the highway you're on!" Blonde: "Oh! Stupid me! Thanks for letting me know, Ill be more careful from now on." At this point the cop looks into the back seat of the car, where the passengers are shaking and white as ghosts. Cop: "Excuse me miss, what's wrong with your friends back there? They're shaking something awful." Blonde: "Oh... We just got off of highway 119".
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has 55.11 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop
Yo mamma so black when she gets in the car the oil light turns on.
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has 55.00 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: black people, car, insulting, racist, Yo mama
Chuck Norris can drive a solar-powered car at night.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
How do bulls drive their cars? They steer them.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
There are 4 guys in a car, 1 from Iowa,1 from Wisconsin, 1 from Florida, and 1 from Illinois. The guy from Florida says "I’m tired of seeing oranges everyday" so he throws some oranges out the window. So then the guy from Iowa says "I’m tired of seeing Corn everyday" so he throws some corn out the window. The guy from Wisconsin is very inspired so he opens the door and pushs the guy from Illinois out of the car!
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has 54.59 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: car, racist
A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit. Finally the bee turned around and flew away. Why? The rabbit had two b's already.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
Walking down the street, a man hears a voice: "Stop! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down and kill you." The man stopped; a big brick fell in front of him. The astonished man continued walking to the cross walk. The voice shouted, "Stop! If you take one more step, a car will run over you and you will die." The man stood still; a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. "Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?" "I am your guardian angel," the voice answered. "Oh yeah?" the man asked. "Where the hell were you when I got married last week?"
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has 54.38 % from 182 votes. More jokes about: car, death, marriage
When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
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