The best car jokes

Q: And where was the location of the accident? A: Approximately milepost 499. Q: And where is milepost 499? A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
Vote: has 20.85 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, cop
In a car there are two persons: a car mechanic and a programmer. They where going to work when suddenly the car broke down. The car mechanic tries to make the car work again but no solution. Suddenly the programmer says: "I say we better FORMAT it!"
Vote: has 19.79 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, geek, IT, mechanic, programmer
What bounces up and down at 100mph? A baby tied to the back of a truck.
Vote: has 19.71 % from 99 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, car, disgusting
Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over a 100 miles per hour. "Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel, "see any cops following us?" The blonde turned around for a long look. "As a matter of fact, I do." "Oh, NOOOO!" yelled the brunette. "Are his flashers on?" The blonde turned around again. "Yup...nope...yup...nope...yup..."
Vote: has 19.47 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, cop
A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to another man in the bar: "Why don't you be a good Samaritan and take him home." The man takes the drunk out the door and to his car and he stumbles at least ten times. They drive along and the drunk points out his house to the man. He stops the car and the drunk stumbles up the steps to his house with the man. The drunk's wife greets them at the door: "Why thank you for bringing him home for me, but where's his wheel chair?"
Vote: has 18.69 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, car, drunk
How many dead babies does it take to change a tire? Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.
Vote: has 14.77 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, car, death
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.' The driver says, 'Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, maybe your radar gun needs calibrating.'
Vote: has 12.47 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, cop
How do you fit 54 Jews in a car? 2 in the front 2 in the back and 50 in the ashtray.
Vote: has 6.32 % from 158 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, jewish, racist