Gordan Ramsey:Theres more smoke in this kitchen than snopp dogg tour bus.
Bruce Wayne first tried wearing a Chuck Norris mask to inspire fear, until he saw himself in the mirror. He immediately changed to the Batman
What was Forrest Gump's email password? 1forrest1
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is white, plastic, and dangerous to children. You put groceries in the other.
Arnold Schwarzenegger always says he'll be back. But Chuck Norris always handles things the first time
I hear Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends are collabing on a new single called "Maybe You're The Problem".
Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
Bill Gates and Jim Cannavino from IBM are arguing about the future of 32-bit operating systems. They decide to throw a coin. Cannavino: "If the number is up, OS/2 will be the new standard, if it’s head Windows95 will be the new standard." Gates: "Hey, you forgot Windows NT." Cannavino: "No, I didn’t. If the coin falls on end, Windows NT will be the future."
Drake Bell: In honor of Kim and Kanye's baby "North West" I will be naming my first son "Taco".
If I could bring one dead person back to life I'd bring back Walt Disney. Just to show him the shows on Disney channel and see his reaction...