The best celebrity jokes

A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?" The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your brother if he’d sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that." So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course, I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great university!" The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh, good heavens! I LOVE Brad Pitt and I would sleep with him in a heartbeat. Are you nuts?" The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" "Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million bucks would buy?" The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?" The boy replied, "Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million dollars, but 'realistically', we’re living with two h***s and a future congressman."
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has 74.15 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, dad, kids, money, school
Everytime a someone tells me my jokes are funny, I say, "Thanks! I got more lines than Whitney Huston's coffee table.".
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
There's a rumor that Steve Jobs, has been a Buddhist, has been reincarnated as a factory worker on a sweatshop assembly line in China.
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, geography, life, technology, work
Eminem says "I'm not afraid". Chuck Norris says "I love the way you lie"
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has 73.75 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, music
"If I could be someone for one day I would be Justin Beiber and run off a cliff"
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has 73.43 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, music
Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as he who shall not be named.
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has 72.54 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris
There was a guy in a bar one night that got drunk, I mean really, really, really drunk. When the bar closed, he got up to go home. As he stumbled out the door, he saw a nun walking on the sidewalk. So he stumbled over to the nun and punched her in the face. Well, the nun was totally surprised, but before she could do or say anything, he punched her again. This time she fell down and he stumbled over to her and kicked her in the butt. Then he picked her up and threw her into a wall. By this time the nun was pretty weak and couldn't move very much. So then he leaned over her, put his face right next to hers and said; "Not very f..kin' strong tonight, are you Batman?"
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has 72.32 % from 86 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, celebrity, drunk
Kim and Kanye naming their baby North West is just like Brad Pitt naming his kid Arm.
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has 71.52 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: baby, celebrity, life, music
What does a black person and Batman have in common? They both can't leave home without Robbin.
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has 71.49 % from 159 votes. More jokes about: black people, celebrity, racist
What was Forrest Gump's email password? 1forrest1
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has 71.40 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, computer, IT, life, technology
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