Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
Vote:
Q: Why aren't there more famous skeletons?
A: They're a bunch of no bodies!
Vote:
Q: What's O. J. Simpson's Internet address?
A: Slash, slash, backslash, slash, slash, escape.
Vote:
Q: What do you call Harrison Ford when he smokes weed?
A: Han So-high
I like my girl to be Hannah on the streets but Miley in the sheets.
Pawn Stars:
Man: "Can I have change for a dollar?"
Rick: "Best I can do is 75 cents."
How come there aren't that many jokes about Jim Jones?
The punchlines are too long.
Chuck Norris was supposed to play the lead role in Mission: Impossible.
He was replaced by Tom Cruise because the tittle wouldn't make any sense.
Vote:
How do you know a man is really a bad dancer?
When he can still step on Dolly Parton's toes.
Grandma: "Why is that dumb piece of cotton candy talking."
Me: "Grandma, thats Nikki Minaj."