Q: What's the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex?
A: Lefty.
Vote:
Gilding the lily is a job seeker's birthright.
Here are a few doozies, where the applicant claimed:
- to be a former CEO of the company to which he was applying.
- to be fluent in two languages—one of which was pig Latin.
- to be a Nobel Prize winner.
- to have worked in a jail when he was really in there serving time.
- he was fired "on accident."
Vote:
Yo mama is so fat, it takes two texts for her to send a selfie.
Vote:
Joke has 63.82 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat, insulting, technology, Yo mama
A piece of sandpaper walks into a bar.
The bartender says "What will it be?"
The sandpaper goes "Just something to take the edge off"
Vote:
Drunk guy gets pulled over.
Officer starts doing sobriety tests on him.
The final test the officer says "if you can pass this last test I will let u go... use the words green pink and yellow in 1 sentence."
So the drunk man replies "My phone went green and I pinked it up and said yellow. Have a nice day officer!"
Vote:
A man has came over to his wife in a request.
She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants.
3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.
Wife: "There's something preying on my mind."
Husband: "Don't worry, it'll soon die of starvation."
Vote:
A white boy and a black boy were arguing one day.
The white boy screams "God is white!"
The black boy screams "God is black!"
This goes on and on for about an hour when all of a sudden there comes a loud crack of lightning and the heavens open up and a booming voice says "I am what I am."
The white boy jumps up and says "See, I told you so!"
To which the black boy says "How does that prove God's white?"
The white boy replies "Because if God were black he would have said, "I is what I is."
Vote:
Joke has 63.46 % from 218 votes. More jokes about: black people, communication, insulting, kids, white people
Knock,Knock,
Who is there?
Pen!
Pen who?
is...
Vote:
Me: "Will you Remember me in a day?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Will you remember me in a week?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Will you remember me in a month?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Will you remember me in a year?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Ok, I have a joke.
Her: "Ok."
Me: "Knock, knock."
Her: "Who's there?"
Me: "You didn't remember me."
Vote: