The best communication jokes

One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated waiting for the pilot to show up so they can get underway. The pilot and copilot finally appear in the rear of the plane and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind; the pilot is using a white cane, bumping into passengers right and left as he stumbles down the aisle. The copilot is using a guide dog. Both have their eyes covered with sunglasses. At first, the passengers do not react thinking that it must be some sort of practical joke. After a few minutes though, the engines start revving, and the airplane begins moving down the runway. The passengers look at each other with some uneasiness. They start whispering among themselves and look desperately to the stewardesses for reassurance. Yet, the plane starts accelerating rapidly, and people begin panicking. Some passengers are praying, and as the plane gets closer and closer to the end of the runway, the voices are becoming more and more hysterical. When the plane has less than twenty feet of runway left, there is a sudden change in the pitch of the shouts as everyone screams at once. At the very last moment, the plane lifts off and is airborne. Up in the cockpit, the copilot breathes a sigh of relief and tells the pilot: "You know, one of these days the passengers aren't going to scream, and we aren't going to know when to take off!"
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: airplane, communication, dog, health
My 3-year-old granddaughter, Sydney, told my husband, Ted, and me that she was going fishing with her dad. Ted asked if she was going to use worms. "No," she said. "I'm going to use a fishing pole."
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: age, communication, fish, kids
A man has came over to his wife in a request. She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants. 3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, sex, wife
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: communication, life, music, science
Wife asked her husband to give her the newspaper. Husband: "How backward you are? Technology has developed so much and you are still asking for the newspaper... Take my iPad..." Wife took the iPad and killed the Cockroach. Husband faints. Moral: Whatever the wife asks, give her without argument. Show your smartness in office, not at home.
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: communication, husband, office, technology, wife
In 2011 someone asked Chuck Norris if he had ever been to Portugal. He answered: "Where?" The country went bankrupt.
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has 64.89 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication, geography, money, travel
Q: Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A: Somebody told him he was ripped!
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, fitness, IT
A random communist leader hears about a man making jokes about him. He organizes a feast and calls the man. Leader: "This is how all meals will look in the future!" Man: (looks for a few seconds at the leader then says): "I thought I was the one around with the jokes."
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, political, time
Yo mama so dumb that when she looked in a mirror she yelled stop copying me.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, stupid, Yo mama
I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, office, work
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