May: "Why did you slap me?!"
Michael: "I didn't slap your face! I High fived it!"
May: "I'm going to tell mom on you when we go to the sea side!"
Micheal: "Uh, Shore you will."
May: "Don't be such a beach."
Vote:
Q: What did the basketball say to the player?
A: Please don't shoot me.
Vote:
Nothing makes me more suspicious than an unsolicited compliment.
Vote:
Librarians may be shy, but their patrons aren't.
Look at their oddball requests:
A patron offered me $100 to steal a cactus from somebody's yard.
A patron wanted me to find a book to teach her dog german.
A patron on his way to the casino asked to rub my red hair for luck.
A patron once asked me for my home phone number so she could call me with reference questions when I wasn't at work.
Q: What is astronauts favorite game in space?
A: Moonopoly.
Vote:
Q: What do you call a very small valentine?
A: A valen-tiny!
Vote:
A mother without any pant was playing with her son.
The boy pointing to her mother's pussy asked: "Mammy, what is that dark wooly between your feet?
Mother: "My sweet that is a brush."
Son: "Where is it's bundle?"
Mother: "In your daddy's pant."
Vote:
One day, a guy walks into a pub and orders a beer.
His friend walks up and sees his red eyes and asks, "Dude, are you okay? You look exhausted".
He replies,"Yeah, I heard about what happened in your house yesterday too. Tough."
His friend says, "Yeah, I wish I could trust my wife a little more - wait... How did you know about that?"
He says,"I was there" and continues chugging his beer.
Vote:
Yo mama is so stupid when you asked her to grab McDonald's she brings the building home.
A white boy and a black boy were arguing one day.
The white boy screams "God is white!"
The black boy screams "God is black!"
This goes on and on for about an hour when all of a sudden there comes a loud crack of lightning and the heavens open up and a booming voice says "I am what I am."
The white boy jumps up and says "See, I told you so!"
To which the black boy says "How does that prove God's white?"
The white boy replies "Because if God were black he would have said, "I is what I is."
Vote:
Joke has 62.47 % from 212 votes. More jokes about: black people, communication, insulting, kids, white people