The best communication jokes

Anthony Weiner got in trouble with his Hispanic online name "Carlos Danger". He is now using a French online name, "Jacques Ouef".
Vote:
has 76.68 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: communication, ethnic, technology
Knock,Knock, Who is there? Pen! Pen who? is...
Vote:
has 76.53 % from 354 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, knock-knock, vulgar
A man was talking to his wife about going to the social security office. He said he would go the next day. So the next morning he goes but when he gets there he realized he forgot his license and she said that was fine she could tell his age by the hair on his chest. So he opened his shirt and everything went smoothly. He got home and told his wife what happened and she said: "well honey if you would have pulled down your pants you could have filed for disability."
Vote:
has 76.06 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, communication, mean, sex, wife
Q: How can you tell there's an afterlife for lawyers? A: Because after they die, they lie still.
Vote:
has 76.06 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: communication, death, lawyer, life
Don't get upset if I ask you where something is in Target when you choose to wear a red shirt and khakis to shop.
Vote:
has 75.97 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service
Little Johnny's father farted. The son asked his father: "What was that?" His father said: "My sweet that is 'north wind'" When he went to school the teacher asked the class: "Who knows the direction of the north wind? Little Johnny shouted: "My daddy's ass!"
Vote:
has 75.88 % from 2765 votes. More jokes about: communication, dad, fart, little Johnny, school
George W. Bush and Bill Clinton both decided to have biographies written about them. George called him "The Three Most Powerful Men - Bush, Dick, and Colon". Bill called his "Sex Between the Bushes"
Vote:
has 75.65 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, political, sex
A daughter wakes up at 3 a.m. and asks her mother: "Mummy, tell me a fairy-tale." "Daddy will get back soon and he will tell both of us a fairy tale..."
Vote:
has 75.57 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: black humor, communication, family, husband
Calling for information about one of my credit cards, I got the following recorded prompt: "Please enter your account number as it appears on your card or statement." I did as instructed, and the system said, "Please enter your five-digit ZIP code." After I put that in, I got a third message: "If you would like your information in English, press one."
Vote:
has 75.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, phone
I quit my gym this morning because one of the instructors started shouting at me, "Come on man, you've got to want it! Come on push. You can do it." I hate being disturbed when I'm having a dump.
Vote:
has 75.38 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: communication, fitness, gym, mean